Of Mustard Seeds and Men

My heart has been heavy the past few weeks. 
So much going on in this world that breaks my heart.
Feel more and more daily like an alien in this world..
oh wait.. I am an alien!!
"Friends, this world is not your home. So don't make yourselves cozy in it. Don't indulge your ego at the expense of your soul..." 1 Peter 2:11

Life is short.
Whether you get 30 years or 60 years or blessed with 80+ years...
Life is short.
"For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes."  James 4:14

The past couple weeks God has shown me some of that reality. 
A precious lady who has dedicated her life to obeying God's calling and command to care for orphans became critically ill in China.  This amazing lady, Joyce, is a British physician who after hearing God's voice stepped into a world of uncertainty with her dear husband, Robin.  They founded and operate New Hope Foster Home where our precious Meisi was loved on and cared for the first two years of her life (this is where LWB Heartbridge Healing home is located).  Brian and I were very privileged to meet them while in China and hear their amazing story of faith and obedience to the Holy Spirit clearly telling Joyce this is what they were supposed to do - care for the sick and dying fatherless children in China.  They now have multiple homes where orphans are provided medical therapy and surgeries and for those that nothing medically can be done to help them, they provide palliative care -they love on them until Jesus takes them into His arms.... I told you she is a precious lady and her husband an amazing man.

When I heard the news of how critically ill Joyce had become, my heart broke.  I prayed along with many others.

A very special and wise friend Sara whose son Gabe was also in New Hope

shared with me as we were discussing the tragedy, "I know we are not indispensable to God, but it is hard to believe that her work here on earth is done...she is doing such good for His glory and is so strategically located to do it. I will fervently pray." 

Praying fervently...with passion...how often do I really do that?

As days have passed we have heard God is doing miraculous things.  First the doctors said there is no way she will make it, and as Robin made the incredibly difficult decision to turn off life support... Joyce began to wake up.  Guess what?? God still does miracles!  The doctors now believe there is no brain damage!

Why are we surprised when God is faithful?
He says in Matthew 21:22, "If you believe you will receive everything you ask in prayer." 
Why do we have such little faith knowing that He says
"Faith as small as a mustard seed can move this mountain.... Nothing will be impossible for you"  Matthew 17:20

I know I have been guilty of praying - "God please do this but if you don't..."  That alone shows my lack of faith - doesn't it? 

Thinking about Joyce and Robin and the manner with which God has used them to help so many children, so many families - all because she heard God tell her to do something and she did it fully.  My fears set in with - what will happen if... who will take over if... what about all those children... 

and, again,  I remember my sweet friend Sara saying, "We are not indispensable to God." 
So very true.
He has this.  He has it all.  He created everything and everyone.
He wants to use us - telling us to "Go."
Whether that be go to my neighbor or go to the ends of the earth -

"Go and preach the good news to all the world"... Mark 16:15
"Go and make disciples of all nations- baptizing them... and teaching them all that I command..". Matthew 28:19

But are we obedient?

I think about the time I have... ever so short as it is.
Am I doing things that are making an eternal impact for God's glory?
I don't have to go far -
starting in my own home - am I discipling my children when we sit, when we eat, when we walk?? 
Am I a living example of His love - even when no one is looking?
Am I praying for open doors and boldness to share with those around me who do not have a personal relationship with Jesus? 
Do I really believe He can and will do miracles? 

I know I haven't been living this daily.
I've allowed idols into my life. 
No - I don't bow down and worship things but how I spend my time shows what/who is most important in my life.

A few weeks ago the kids and I were reading from "Mighty Acts of God" about the Israelites and their worshipping the golden calf when Moses came off the mountain after being with God (when God gave them the 10 Commandments). 
I asked, "What are examples of idols people have today?"
Immediately, without hesitation - my dear Aili says, "Your phone!" 

.............    breath in ..... breath out ..... and hear the truth  ....

Thank you Lord that she could boldly tell me what I needed to hear.
Truth - I am always looking at it to see email, my calendar, facebook, blogs... living in a virtual world instead of living for God in the world in front of me.

So change.
Change my heart oh God - make it ever true.
Change my heart oh God - may I be like you.. 

Other examples of idols she shared were - money, work, TV, computer, books, people, our looks and our stuff...  She is 8.

I know I can't do all these things alone - I am not self sufficient. but I praise God that when I am weak He is strong.  I can do All things through Him.  I can believe because He is faithful. I am thankful that I am still a work in progress and He is the potter continually shaping me into the vessel He intends for me to be.

Will you join me in praying, fervently praying -
Lord - keep healing Joyce!  Please don't let the swelling that is expected in the next few days in her brain to cause any issues.  Please Lord let it be your will for her to remain with us on earth to continue to be used to heal the sick and fatherless and love on those waiting to go to you. 

Lord thank you for Sara and her wisdom.  Lord I pray that you heal Seth, her precious son that you used as a vessel in our lives to lead us to adoption.  I love this little guy and am so thankful you answered all my prayers for him to be in a family that loves you and lives for you Jesus and that would shower him with more love than imaginable.  You answered my prayer for them to provide the best medical care possible.  Yet the doctors have said he is inoperable.  God I pray, as the Great Physician that you do something miraculous in his little heart.  Lord, please, please let it be your will to heal him.

I also pray for little Teresa Lord.  I do not know her family but you do and you and only you can heal broken hearts.  Please Lord touch her heart and help it to beat properly and for her to have a full recovery. 

Lord, please change my heart - help me to put nothing and no one before you. Help me to let go of my selfishness and pride.   Help me to live my life fully for you with boldness, sharing your amazing love with everyone around me.  Help me to not conform to this world but be transformed.

Thank you for your love - your never ending, never giving up love that held you to a cross for me. Thank you for overcoming even death so that I may have a personal relationship with you.

It is in Jesus's precious and Holy name I pray.  Amen.

If you do not know Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior I would love to talk with you about how He came to rescue you and I and all those in the world.  He loves you so much He wants to adopt you into His family.  There has never been nor will there ever be anyone who loves you more than Jesus.